Conrad Julius Ecklie (conrad_ecklie) wrote,
Conrad Julius Ecklie
conrad_ecklie

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Theatrical Muse: Week 130: Question 130

Name: Conrad Ecklie

Fandom:
CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Word Count: 470


Loyalty.


When you work as a public servant, especially in areas dealing with crime, such as being a policeman or a Crime Scene Investigator, loyalty is everything. I rely on the officers at the scene to clear it before I start my work, so I can be safe while I’m doing my job. I rely on my team to do what I ask them, when I ask them, so we can solve the case smoothly, quickly and efficiently. And by quickly, I do not mean making a hash job of it, but doing it properly and logically, and not slacking off on the job. Above all, we’re the ones responsible for what happens at the end of the case, and that bounds us mind and body to doing the best job we can.

In a job such as mine, loyalty is one of the most important things. I rely on the loyalty of the officers at the scene, and the victim, and the victim’s family, has to have loyalty in me and my team to do our jobs right, and to the best of our ability, so, hopefully, they can finally have some form of resolution.

Outside of work, just living a daily life, the only real loyalty I have to anyone, is to myself, and to my aunt. There is a possibility that I have loyalty to my religion, because, after all, I believe in God and go to church every Sunday, but that’s a different kind of loyalty. It’s religious loyalty, religious faithfulness, and that’s different from the kinds of loyalty that I have in relation to my work, and what’s left of my family, and myself.

Honestly? I sometimes bash myself up for not being more loyal to Michelle. It’s hard, every single day, to think, that if I’d just done something different, I could have saved her. Yes, we both might have been killed, or it might have been the other way around, and just been me, but, still, I could have saved her. I kick myself for that, even though people tell me there’s nothing I could have done.

The thing is, I know what true love is, after having had her by my side, as my lover. It’s not something you know what it is, precisely, until you’ve got it in its truest, purest form. You can’t even begin to realise what it is, if you think you’ve got it, because you don’t know what it is until you do have it. It’s not something you come to learn, it’s something you know immediately, or, almost immediately. Either way, when you find it, and it finds you, you know that true love, is, indeed, true love.

I should have been more loyal to my true love. Knowingly, I’ll die alone, and it’s all my fault.
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